The Vine

Thursday, June 24, 2004

Having to Pee

There was this cartoon, something B. Kliban style, that I have never forgotten! Just two panels, each a cartoon section of the human brain, one male and the other female. On the male side the brain was divided amongst: sports (the biggest part), work (a subset of sports), beer, sex (the second largest part) and, as a small part within sex, The Relationship.

The female brain was similarly divided, with, of course, shopping being the largest portion. Second largest was The Relationship, the within that, sex as a proportionately smaller subsection. No surprises, except for a distinct portion of the brain dedicated to "Having to Pee."

Which of course was the whole joke, at least from the point of view of a woman looking at the cartoon!

My old girlfriend J once told me NOT TO HOLD MY PEE, as all of us girls do on a regular basis because really we DO have to pee more often than we are presented with socially acceptable occasions to do so, because, she told me, holding your pee hurts your courage.

At the time, there was no place in my mind to process such an allegation, possibly because The Relationship was taking up too much space.

Holding your pee hurts your courage?? What kind of talk was that? Until, much later, did I look at the connections between adrenal function (which is what courage is made of) and renal function (which is where pee is made). If you hold your pee, what your body understands is that a frightening situation is in effect, such that if you took the moment to pee, your life might be in danger. You are prepared for fight or flight, no time to drop your panties! But, because of shame, a false sense of danger is given, because there is no safe, private, shame-free place to pee, or even just the possibility that someone will know that you are going to pee makes you hold it. So women are always in a subliminal state of fear and of having to pee.

One of the recent times I felt this pressure was at Barton Springs, on the south side, in the Dog Park end of the springs. So, I swam in the dogpoop end of Barton Springs, then didn't change out of my wet swimsuit and didn't pee because those things were inconvenient. So guess what, I got a bladder infection.

NOW talk about having to pee! Only you go to do it and you get a dribble, and you still have to pee! Piss!

UTI's are usually treated with antibiotics. Unfortunately, antibiotic treatments, especially if relied on sequentially, make you more subject to E. coli infections in general. So even Prescriptions for Nutritional Healing recommends that a natural approach to fighting UTI's is best. Save the antibiotics for tuberculosis or something.

And sure enough, if I take my UTI Tea formula, and some Colloidal Silver, my having to pee problems are vanquished.

UTI Tea: one part marshmallow root, two parts horsetail(aka shavegrass) and three pars uva ursi. Simmer a palmful in two mugs of prified water for 5 minutes, then drink this tea on an empty stomach 4 times a day.

3 Comments:

At 3:14 PM, Blogger drc said...

Wow. Now I know why I get those stupid infections!

 
At 7:01 AM, Blogger dragonfly jenny said...

oh yeah, swimming at the dog beach, not changing out of my wet suit before hopping on my bike and riding to my next destination ... been there done that many times. Perhaps because I always end up having to pee (combined effects of chilly water and whatever I'm drinkin') and always take time to cop a squat in the bushes. I haven't experienced a UTI after being exposed to those conditions.

 
At 7:01 AM, Blogger dragonfly jenny said...

oh yeah, swimming at the dog beach, not changing out of my wet suit before hopping on my bike and riding to my next destination ... been there done that many times. Perhaps because I always end up having to pee (combined effects of chilly water and whatever I'm drinkin') and always take time to cop a squat in the bushes. I haven't experienced a UTI after being exposed to those conditions.

 

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